November 29, 2023

Astrology for the Weak January 20-26, 2013

(January 19 – February 16)
The beginning of a new year finds your wanderlust reaching near epidemic proportions. Even a flight on Southwest cattle-call airlines sounds pretty good.

(February 16 – March 11)
Go ahead and ask yourself the really big questions. Am I happy? Am I satisfied? Am I fulfilled? Do I feel good? Why are we all here? Then get a Happy Meal.

(March 20 – April 18)
You’ ll be in a very lovey-dovey kind of place this month. There is almost certainly going to be a little hand holding and maybe even an Eskimo kiss in store for you.

(April 18 – May 13)
If you didn’t get exactly, precisely, entirely what you wanted for Christmas, don’t get moody. Don’t you pout. Don’t whine–drink some wine and shop online.

(May 13 – June21)
Deep thoughts lead to wonderful ideas. Like when wondering what to do with Aunt Ethel. Road trip to Vegas and Disneyland, then wine country comes to mind.

(June 21 – July 20)
In January, a little disagreement can be a very good thing. So, jump into that debate with yourself with both feet. The good news is: either way, you’ll be right.

(July 20 – August 10)
You’ve had a great idea you’ve been saving up, and now is the time to share it. Just think–after decades of ridicule, you’ll be known as the person with one good idea.

(August 10 – September 16)
Don’t forget to carry extra chapstick with you this month. You will need those kissing lips to be super supple. After all, mirrors get awfully cold in January.

(September 16 – October 30)
Starting a new romance? Get ready for it to take a surprising turn. Things will happen that you could have never expected–like your date showing up with a date.

(October 30 – November 23)
Frustrated? Try the first thing that comes into your head! Try the craziest thing that comes to mind! Try the thing you always wanted to try! Then just walk away.

(November 23 – November 29)
Resolutions, schmesolutions–another year of unkept promises. This year, you will promise not to make any vows or change a thing about yourself. Congrats!

(November 29 – December 17)
Those who once looked askance at your slow, steady pace are suddenly wondering how you got so far out in front. Hey, noses were meant for more than breathing.

(December 17 – January 20)
You will dedicate yourself to better the world this January. Your New Year’s resolution was to vow to work tirelessly change the things you don’t like in others.

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