April 19, 2024

First Family To Go To Moon Soon … by Blodwyn Smythe

With just days before Halloween, a month before Thanksgiving, yet still another month to go before revelers get to shout, “Merry Christmas,” becuase Americans know that wishing people “Happy Holidays” or “Peace on Earth, Good Will To Men” is totally unacceptable in the new Trumpian World, formerly the United States of America, scuttlebut is leaking from the White House that the Trumps are planning an extended vacation out of this world – the likes of which no one has ever witnessed. Someone was even rumored to have been concked on the head for writing, “Jesus is the Reason for the Season” on…

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It’s a Matter of Waste

Pictured above is a landfill–the place where unwanted waste is disposed of. Huge mounds of waste are dumped into behemoth holes in the earth dug specifically to hold everything discarded by humans. While much of what people toss into heaps is recyclable, people choose to bag it and drop it in their garbage cans along with a large amount of compostable waste, purely for convenience. Only around 25% of recyclable materials currently make it to recycle centers due to human laziness. Now, some haulers are trying to capitalize of people’s lack of knowledge and dump their recyclables in one container…

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Booms Rattle a Country?

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Pictured above is a clip from the movie “Mars Attacks.” While this is clearly an animated character, it represents the big-headed aliens that are predicted to eventually launch an assault on Earth. Some people think the recent booms were sonic booms created by extraterrestrial aircraft zipping around the world. Rumors of an upcoming invasion are now reaching beyond the sets of Hollywood. While the Martians may not be little green men from outer space (there would have to be some women–unless, of course they would be coming here to take ours) they could, if they exist, still pose a serious threat…

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Unicorn Find Is Debunked

Pictured above is an artist’s rendition of a unicorn, the most important imaginary animal of the Middle Ages and Renaissance, when it was commonly described as an extremely wild woodland creature, a symbol of purity and grace, which could only be captured by a virgin. Until the 19th century, belief in unicorns was widespread among historians, alchemists, writers, poets, naturalists, physicians, and theologians. Since then, unicorns tend to exist only in the minds of children and those labeled “out there.” by Blodwyn Smythe, Excentric World’s Ace Reporter THE WORLD: News is that a group of archaeologists in Pyongyang, North Korea…

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Which Witch Will Twitch?

An Excentric World undercover reporter was recently dispatched to infiltrate the committee responsible for privatization of National Parks. To maintain his cover, photos had to be taken at night. Most park facilities include a visitors center, classrooms, theaters, gift shops, picnic tables, developed trails, restrooms and group areas with ramadas and facilities, some used for weddings. When revenue data was plugged in from the parks that included concessions, the computer hard drive fried. Danger, Will Robinson. by Blodwyn Smythe, Sedona’s Virtual Reporter SEDONA, AZ: Not too long ago, the Romanian government passed a witch tax. The tax levies a duty…

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