Getting Older
cur-mudg-eon (cur-muj’un), n. [origin unknown] 1. archaic: a crusty, ill-tempered, churlish old man. 2. modern: anyone who hates hypocrisy and pretense and has the temerity to say so; anyone with the habit of pointing out unpleasant facts in an engaging and humorous manner.
“In the old days, it was not called ‘the Holiday Season’; the Christians called it ‘Christmas’ and went to church; the Jews called it ‘Hanukka’ and went to synagogue; the atheists went to parties and drank. People passing each other on the street would say ‘Merry Christmas!’ or ‘Happy Hanukka!’ or (to the atheists) ‘Look out for the wall!'”
— Dave Barry
“I’m glad cavepeople didn’t invent television, because they would have just sat around and watched talk shows all day instead of creating tools.”
— Dave James
“Years ago we discovered the exact point the dead center of middle age. It occurs when you are too young to take up golf and too old to rush up to the net.”
— Franklin P. Adams
“Age does not diminish the extreme disappointment of having a scoop of ice cream fall from the cone.”
— Jim Fiebig
“There is still no cure for the common birthday.”
— John Glenn
“One of the good things about getting older is you find you’re more interesting than most of the people you meet.”
— Lee Marvin
“The only victory over love is flight.”
— Napoleon Bonaparte
“After thirty, a body has a mind of its own.”
— Bette Midler
“Thirty-five is a very attractive age. London society is full of women of the very highest birth who have, of their own free choice, remained thirty-five for years.”
— Oscar Wilde
“It takes a long time to grow young.”
— Pablo Picasso
“In the book of life, the answers aren’t in the back.”
— Charlie Brown
