November 15, 2019

Yes, I’m a Senior Citizen

  • I’m the life of the party… even if it lasts until 8 p.m.
  • I’m very good at opening childproof caps… with a hammer.
  • I’m usually interested in going home before I get to where I am going.
  • I’m awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.
  • I’m smiling all the time because I can’t hear a thing you’re saying.
  • I’m very good at telling stories; over and over and over and over…
  • I’m aware that other people’s grandchildren are not nearly as cute as mine.
  • I’m so cared for: long term care, eye care, private care, dental care.
  • I’m not really grouchy, I just don’t like traffic, waiting, crowds, lawyers, loud music, unruly kids, Jenny Craig and Toyota commercials, barking dogs, politicians and a few other things I can’t seem to remember right now.
  • I’m sure everything I can’t find is in a safe, secure place…somewhere.
  • I’m wrinkled, saggy, lumpy–and that’s just my left leg.
  • I’m having trouble remembering simple words like….
  • I’m beginning to realize that aging is not for wimps.
  • I’m sure they are making adults much younger these days, and when did they let kids become policemen?
  • I’m wondering, if you’re only as old as you feel, could I be 150?
  • I don’t get how can my kids be older than I feel sometimes?
  • I’m a walking storeroom of facts–I’ve just lost the key to the door.

 

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