September 18, 2018

Biggest Task in America

ECONOMIC RECOVERY NEWS: Economists say that when the dollar is weak, meaning it’s losing value compared to other currencies, one benefit is that more American products can be sold overseas. Now, the biggest task for American manufacturers is to find a way to sell more products in America. EDUCATION NEWS: The latest trend in modern education is tutoring 2 and 3-year-olds for preschool. Next will come surrogate potty training followed by substitute breast feeding. END OF THE WORLD NEWS: According to Harvard University scientists, a dying star lurking dangerously close to Earth is on the brink of exploding into a…

Strong Showing of Patriotism in the US

Excentric World staff members look at the strong showing of patriotism in the United States during the celebration of Independence Day. Every year since declaring its independence from England in 1776, citizens and occupants of the U.S. gather en masse to cheer at fireworks displays, barbecue with friends and neighbors, and pontificate of our triumph over tyranny while sporting beer toting hard hats loaded with cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon and convenient straws (the ultimate Father’s Day gift). Judging by the broad smile on his face, this Yankee doodle dandy is truly reveling in the spirit of freedom and the…

Playing for Keeps

Keep those wheels of commerce turning; Keep those suckers greased. Keep those time share condos churning; Keep those suckers leased. Keep your looks your highest passion; Keep on buying shoes. Keep your children high on fashion; Keep ignoring clues. Keep five-dollar coffee pumping; Keep refining taste. Keep those plastic bottles dumping; Keep refueling waste. Keep those Hummers gassed and guzzled; Keep those engines hot. Keep your horse sense tightly muzzled; Keep the past un-taught. Keep The Truth from dimly blinking; Keep all wisdom gone. Keep America from thinking. Keep on keeping on. Related posts: 4-D Printers Disapproval New Year’s Vow…

Keep America Beautiful

Many of you 50 and older are quite confused about how we should present ourselves. You’re unsure about the kind of image you are projecting, and whether or not you are correct as you try to conform to the fashions that the designers inflict upon the world. So here are the results of a study of the situation. Despite what you may have seen on the streets, the following combinations DO NOT go together and should be avoided: 1. A nose ring and bifocals 2. Spiked hair and a bald spot 3. A pierced tongue and dentures 4. Miniskirt and…

Confirmed

I’ve heard you say your fellow man, And fellow woman, too, Is “crazy as a crocodile Who’s feet are stuck in glue.” “As batty as a bedbug” or “As loony as a lark” “As zany as a zebra” or “As quirky as a quark”; “As silly as a sailor” or “As pouty as a punk” “As goofy as a gopher” or “As squirrely as a skunk.” A brand new study indicates You didn’t speak too soon: One-quarter of Americans Are¬†loopy as a loon! Quote: “One in four exhibit signs Of clear insanity.” (Which makes me stop and wonder where They…