April 25, 2024

Horoscopes for October 21-27, 2012

ARIES (March 21 – April 19)

You show your lack of finances savvy this month, when a friend suggests you invest in stocks and you stock up on chicken, beef and vegetable broths.

TAURUS (April 20 – May 20)

You will decide to cash in on a new health care system. Knowing that the wheels of government turn slowly, you will busily clear land for a political leech farm.

GEMINI (May 21 -June 20)

You’ll attend a wild Halloween party where everyone wears masks, costumes or disguises. At the midnight unveiling, you will realize you had the wrong address.

CANCER (June 21 – July 22)

You will venture on a voyage to find your inner child. Though it will be a relatively short trip, you’ll be totally freaked out by sugar plum fairies dancing in your head.

LEO (July 23 – August 22)

The Saturn/Uranus opposition may bring unexpected news associated with your job. There’s talk of you getting a pink slip, or a pair of red panties. It’s confusing.

VIRGO (August 23 – September 22)

This month, Mercury moves into direct motion. This could be the time when you decide to present your new and creative ideas. Sadly, no one will give a rat’s prat.

LIBRA (September 23 – October 22)

You will go through a period of reflection, detecting a link between a past event and matters that concern you now. Think hard, did you get dropped on your head?

SCORPIO (October 23 – November 21)

There‚Äôs lots of fiery energy in you as you set new goals for yourself in your romantic life and prepare for a brand new relationship. Don’t forget to tell your spouse.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22 – December 21)

This month will be confusing, as your mind seems to be saying one thing, while your partner is saying another. Ignore your mind or risk becoming celibate.

CAPRICORN (December 22 – January 19)

You’ll want to connect with an existing lover or a brand new catch. Time to play the fun card. So, put on your snazziest ensemble and shake your money maker.

AQUARIUS (January 20 – February 18)

Temptation is there in October to adopt a devil-may-care attitude and do things your way. Frank Sinatra you ain’t. Seek advice, even if from a complete stranger.

PISCES (February 19 – March 20)

You could suddenly only have eyes for that new person that has just entered your life. Of course, your hands, feet and private parts still belong to your partner.

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