November 13, 2018

Every Vote Was Counted

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real state agent which direction was North because, he explained, he didn’t want the sun waking him. She asked, “Does the sun rise in the North?” When another person explained that the sun rises in the East (and has for some time), she shook her head and said, “Oh, I don’t keep up with that stuff.” And then she voted!

I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was open. I told him, “The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.” He responded, “Is that Eastern or Pacific time?” And then he voted!

My colleague and I were eating our lunch when we overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a convertible, but “didn’t think she’d get sunburned because the car was moving.” And then she voted!

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car. It’s designed to cut through a seat belt if she gets trapped. She keeps it handy in the passenger side door’s map pocket. And then she voted!

I was hanging out with a friend of mine when we saw a woman walk by us with a nose ring attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, “Wouldn’t the chain rip out every time she turned her head?” I had to explain to her that a person’s nose and ear remain the same distance apart no matter which way the head is turned! And then she voted!

My girlfriend and I were picking up some sandwiches from a sub place last week and she asked the clerk which of two sandwiches was better. The clerk didn’t have an opinion but did say that the first sandwich was more expensive. My girlfriend asked, “Why are they both the same price on the menu?” The clerk responded, “I don’t think they tax the turkey.” And then he voted!

I couldn’t find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because they were trained professionals and I was in good hands. “Now,” she asked me, “has your plane arrived yet?” And then she voted!

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