July 21, 2018

Senior Household Hints

  • Start a compost heap with that stuff in the bottom of the vegetable bin in your refrigerator.
  • Patch holes in walls with leftover Thanksgiving stuffing.
  • Save belly button lint and use it for stuffing teddy bears.
  • Grout your kitchen and bathroom tile with cake frosting.
  • Fix-A-Dent can also be used to fill cracks in furniture.
  • Catnip can double as an aphrodisiac.
  • Clean family heirloom china with salt and white vinegar. Then sell the junk and take a vacation.
  • Drive roaches away by sprinkling that cheap wine your friends bring over around the baseboards.
  • Hair spray and a lighter can be combined to burn off weeds.
  • Patch road potholes with oldy, moldy, mystery leftovers.
  • Stomping on scorpions can be considered aerobic exercise.
  • Grind saved empty eggshells to sprinkle on icy driveways. (The emphasis here is on empty).
  • Fewer showers and baths mean less mildew.
  • Vodka opens tight jar lids. Sometimes a third shot is needed. It’s scotch that softens the hard water.
  • Make Depends out of old t-shirts and plastic wrap.
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